This review contains spoilers which only the limp-brained wouldn’t guess anyway!
Went to see ‘Thor’ last night and I suppose I should begin my review by ‘fessing up that he is one of my least favourite Marvel characters (Daredevil runs him close) so I wasn’t over-excited about the film but I was willing to give it a fair-minded shot.
The film’s story is typically anodyne Prologue/Three Act blockbuster fare. Expositional Prologue giving us a headsup on the whole Asgard thingy and explains how Odin (a quite embarrassed looking Anthony Hopkins, who I suspect demanded more money once he’d seen his costume) had defeated the evil frost giants and brought peace to the Nine Worlds. First Act: introduction of Hero, the eponymous Thor (a charisma-less Chris Hemsworth) who is an arrogant, overbearing lout, dazzled by his own popularity, and the Villain, his envious brother Loki (a subtle portrayal by Tom Hiddleston, but Tom, believe me, this sure as hell wasn’t the place for subtlety). A lets-show-off-our-special-effects battle scene leads to Thor being banished from Asgard and Odin having what appears to be a stroke. Second Act: Thor minus powers and his magic hammer, Mjöllnir, arrives on earth where he meets love interest Natalie Portman (so wooden I suspect a wardrobe could have given a better performance) and learns humility, modesty and how to be less of a wuss. Third Act: Redemption. Thor gets his powers back, goes home to defeat sneaky Loki and gets a hug from dad who has miraculously recovered.
I mean, is this really the best Hollywood scriptwriting could come up with? Hackneyed, predictable, and totally devoid of any tension this is by-the-numbers scriptwriting at its worst. They must have twigged how turgid it all was when they desperately tried to shoehorn some humour into the thing (mostly provided by Kat Demmings who was the best thing in the movie). Talking of shoehorning, couldn’t they have integrated the cameos of characters from the Avengers movie with a little more finesse: Hawkeye looked ridiculously out of place.
Okay, so the special effects were STUNNING but surely a movie should be more than just pyrotechnic eye-candy?
It seems that once again my opinion is at odds with the rest of the cinema-going public who have given the film a massive thumbs-up. For my part I thought the whole thing was irredeemably boring but perhaps the most telling criticism came from Nelli: she fell asleep.
Rod’s score: 4/10
Nelli’s score: 2/10
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